Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Hump Day Confessions

Happy Wednesday!

2 more days!   2 more days!

It's confession time today ladies!

1.) My favorite pair of yoga pants has an unfortunate hole in the crotch.  Normal people would throw them away, but I just can't!  They are soooo comfy and it's just a little hole...No I don't just wear them to bed either.  Sometimes they are my morning bagel run pants.  It's not like I'm bending over in them, so it's fine?!  And sometimes like tonight I run out of real non holey yoga pants (I have 7 pairs of perfectly intact yoga pants--but none are as comfy) and I wear them to Zumba.  Zumba is a standing workout so it's NBD because I don't bend over or straddle anything.  The booty may also be saggy but they're 6 years old so who cares about the molecular integrity of the pants?

2.) When I don't know or can't do a Zumba move I just whip out a ballet equivalent.  Sowhatwhocares?  Sometimes people think it looks impressive?  Maybe?  NO?  I should just stop and actually learn the move called the cut cut ninja?

3.) I still have my Limited Too shorts from 3rd grade.  I'm 23.  Limited Too is no longer a store.  They have little puppies playing sports on them!  What's not to love?  And who doesn't want DANCE emblazoned on their booty with rhinestones?  Thankfully after 13 years the rhinestones have worn off/fallen off/jumped off/sacrificed themselves to the sequin god, because how did we sit?  I mean owwww!  Sitting on a rhinestone is to your booty what finding a Lego is to your feet!  Not comfy!

4.) I don't understand the hockey craze.  I'm from Philly and I know we're all supposed to bleed orange and black, but hasn't anyone heard of baseball?  Or football?  I know you need something to amuse yourself during the cold winter months and since the Sixers are, well the Sixers, it's hard to find your sports fix, but come on!  After 5 years of French, I still can't pronounce a majority of the players' names and if I can't say, "Oh yeah __________ had an amazing hat trick last night" without stumbling over all those vowels, then, no I don't wanna be a fan.

5.) I judge girls who wear dresses to baseball games.  And the ones in heels.  Get over yourself!  Wear a jersey!  Show some team spirit!  Who are you trying to impress?  The players can't see you way up there in the upper deck...

6.) I also judge people at sporting events who are wearing completely wrong sports, cities, or team jerseys to the event.  If you are at a Philies game you have a few options:  Phillies gear (duh), whoever they are playing.  This are the first and obvious choices.  I don't wanna see your Minnesota Timberwolves jersey in Citizen's Bank Park.  Yes, wolves are majestic creatures, but they have no place in Philly!  I will allow Eagles/Flyers/Sixers/Wings gear at the game.  I will allow gear from the opposing team's city--but keep your random sports gear to yourself!  Wear it on your couch with your digital MLB Network loving self.  Don't bring it in my stadium!

To read about some of my other Phillies Snafu's and Things I deteste about people at games click here----->What the Phillies Game Is NOT

xoxo,

E

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