Thursday, January 10, 2013

Why Denzel Washington Should Be Andy Reid's Replacement

     Soooooooo, with Andy Reid graciously leaving (I agree that we need a change but I will be sad that he's leaving.  He's an iconic person in Philadelphia sports' history and deserves that much respect.  I wish him all the best with his future NFL endeavors.) the Philadelphia Eagles are in search of their next coach.  I have taken it upon myself to help narrow the selection for Jeff Lurie.  Here are my top 5:

1) Denzel Washington
2) Coach Beast
3) Matthew McConaughey
4) Pat Summitt
5) Rudy Ruettiger

I think Denzel is our safest bet.  Here are my reasons

1) Geography:

Denzel's son goes to UPenn.  Therefore he's already in the area/knows the people/gets the vibe of the city/MOST importantly he knows how nuts Philly Phans are!  WE BLEED GREEN!

2) Acting Cred:

Denzel has played everyone.  Literally EVERYONE!  He was a Civil War Hero in Gettysburg, a gangsta, a pilot, fairy-tale voiceover, and he even filmed on location in Philly for Philadelphia.  He's been nominated for numerous Oscars and Golden Globes.  He's perfect.  He will study up and be ready come Training Camp.  

3) Football Knowledge:

We ALL saw Remember the Titans.  He coached TC Williams' High School to a winning season.  He overcame adversity, racial divides, lack of skill/talent, personality conflicts, and violence.  He's a great coach.  If he just channelled Coach Boone he would be GOLDEN!!  He also is tough as nails!  His "If you drop my football, you run a mile!" quote is amazing and so inspirational.  Also, training camp would be a blast!  I think the Eagles should interview each other to get to know each other better.  So Cute!!  Also, Ryan Gosling will tap dance.  The Rev and Louie will duet.  All of this is just perfect and not something they have ever done before.  #Yourmamajokesrunwildpuuuhhhllleeeeeze

4) Built In (Trustworthy) Staff:

Hayden Panettiere, as Cheryl of course, could be our new announcer.  

Coach Yoast is a great Assistant Coach!

Louis Lastik, great high school lineman, plus he has a great personality!!  Philly girls will eat him up!  And Geno's will be glad that he's here!  And since I doubt he will be reprising his role as Frankie in the upcoming and much anticipated (and feared) Girl Meets World.  He could be O Line coach!  

5)  Ryan Gosling

I know that I don't really need to give anyone a reason why Ryan Gosling is an additional bonus main reason that Denzel should come coach the Birds. In my mind, they are clearly friends, like besties status.  Ryan will want to come to support his main man Denzel.  Therefore Denzel will bring Ryan to Philadelphia and make every woman in the tri-state area swoon and happy.  The living embodiment of the Ryan Gosling memes in our very own backyard!  EEK!  

Okay people, so while the Philadelphia Phans are waiting with bated breath, I just want you to let this idea roll around in your phanatical minds.  Denzel is our guy.  The remaining cast of Remember the Titans can feel free to come along, too.  Because I think they are stronger together than apart.  



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