What To Do When He's Just Not That Into You

Okay, so I just finished watching He's Just Not That Into You...pretty much the worst movie ever.  Here's why:

1)  It promotes the notion that even if a guy ignores you, treats you like crap, and is all in all awful to you, if you hold on long enough, he will eventually be yours.  Do you know why he will eventually be yours?  No not because he was meant to be yours, no, all the girls that knew their worth (that he did NOT see) LEFT!!  They strapped on their Louboutins and sashayed away to bigger and better things.  TRUE STORY GIRL!  Remember, think F. Scott Fitzgerald

Remember this is not going to make you feel better right away...but it will.

2)  It promotes cheating on your wife.  GROSS

3)  Jennifer Aniston does NOT get enough screen time.

So this movie got me thinking what it is that I do to help me get over guys when my limp and lifeless iphone reminds me that he's just not that into me.  Feel free to borrow/copy/add any of your own perkerupperers to the list:

1)  WEAR HIGH HEELS JUST BECAUSE!  This is crucial because heels always make you feel more confident.  Even faked confidence makes you feel better.  I prefer Monsieur Louboutin's because each painful step forces me to remember, "Damn, I look good in my shoes!"

2)  GO OUT!  Do NOT sit down...EVER!  Call every friend you know and just go out.  I prefer dinner with a really good friend who will provide you with the perfect balance of cuddles, tough love, inspiration, and humor.  Life is better like this.  Even if you don't want to go out...GO OUT!

3)  MAKE A NEW PLAYLIST.  Every relationship needs a soundtrack.  These are a few of my favorites:

"Cups" Anna Kendrick from Pitch Perfect
"Brave" Sara Bareilles
"Defying Gravity" Kristen Chenowerth and Idina Menzel
"More to Me Than You" Jessica Andrews
"So Much Better" Laura Bell Bundy
"Catch My Breath" Kelly Clarkson
"Since You've Been Gone" Kelly Clarkson
"Girls" Beyonce
"22" T-Swift
"Somebody's Everything" Dolly Parton
"Best Days of Your Life" Kelly Pickler
"Thanks for the Memories" Fall Out Boy
"Country Girl (Shake It For Me)" Luke Bryan (song is awesome plus he is yummy!)

****Any and all country songs are usually my top pick*****

4) AVERSION THERAPY!  Have a best friend, co-worker, mother, sister, barista, or anyone you are wallowing to point out when you are being pathetic and whining.  This is crucial. Yes we all want people to be warm and cuddly like our fav snuggly jammies when we come to the realization that he's just not that into you, but what we need is someone to force you to look at all of your good qualities and reiterate that you can and will be just fine.  *I don't support saying mean things or slamming the guy because if he can't tell you to your face that he's just not that into you, then who he is is really self explanatory.  No need for anyone to waste any breath more breath on him.*

5)  GET A HOT REVENGE DRESS!  Revenge dresses come in two colors:  black or red.  Even as a self professed pink phanatic I stray from my signature color (kudos to those of you who got and appreciated the reference) and go with BOTH!  Sometimes you need two nights to go out and look fabulous.

6)  This is the most important rule:  Never, Ever, Ever, feel bad about yourself. If he's just not that into you, well guess what?  Someone once was probably just not that into him, and once you were probably just not that into someone.  It's a vicious cycle my friends.  And it's better to be one frog closer to Prince Charming, right?

So, go ahead, put on your snuggly jammies, curl up with some chocolate cake (prefereably from Wegman's) and pop in Romy and Michele's High School Reunion and relax.  Yes, yes, all of this is easier said than done, but I promise (from a girl who has been there maaaaaaaaaannnnnnnyyyyy times) it will indeed get so much better!

P.S. NO ONE SHOULD EVER HAVE TO WATCH HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU.  EVER!!

Erin Kitley...Ghost Buster?!

      BOOOO!  Ever since I was a little girlie I have always been a firm believer in ghosts.  Never the scary mean ghosts, but the good ghosts who try to help you along.  When I was little  last year, I would sometimes watch a scary show right before bed and then live in fear that a ghost was in my bedroom.  So I would hide under the covers, peek out over the top of the sheets...and wait.  Wait for what?  I have no clue!  I would then close my eyes and wish the ghosts away.  So there I was, in the dark, trying to fight ghosts...with prayer!  Please let the ghosts go away!

      So fast forward to 20 year old Erin.  Ghosts still haunt me and keep me up at night.  However, these are not the kind that scary white sheet wearing ghosts, no boys who you date for a few months and then stop calling you.  These boys ghost!  Ghosting is a term that means someone just disappears.  They just stop calling you, or texting you, or emailing you.  This is the version of ghosts I now keep me up at night.

     Surprisingly, I have acquired a few ghosts in my dating adventures.  I have come up with a few ways to become a stellar ghost buster!  When I was 20 I fought with conventional ghost hunting wisdom:  I confronted the ghost and told him to leave.  This was awful ghost busting!  That philosophy may work on the white sheet wearing ghosts with black eye slits, but it doesn't work when ghost busting boys.  After that ghost busting debacle, I decided to make a ghost busting change.  I would do what I did when I was 5 and just pray that the ghost would go back into my closet with the other monsters.  So this time I decided to just ignore the ghost and pretend he is not here.  And guess what?!  It is working!!!!  I am much happier this time around without my ghost still haunting me!

     So sometimes I think you need to realize that the ghost may always be there, but you can either choose to believe in the ghost's presence or you can just NOT believe that the ghost is there.  Man Ghosts are just like the ghosts that haunted us at 5.  They are transparent, they are flimsy and they are not real.  They do not have enough substance to break up with you like a real man.  And I do not want to date any flimsy men.  No sir, no ma'am.  So, this is what I'm going to do.  I'm going to pretend the ghost never existed and so this is the plan right now.


xoxo,

Erin

Walnut Fudge and Other Life Lessons Learned at the non-MTV Jersey Shore

It's officially summer!!  Beach+Summer Solstice+Outdoor Country Concerts+More Beach!

Friday was Summer Solstice so, yes it is officially summer!  However, the Erin Calendar goes as follows:

Winter-Black Friday to Easter Saturday
Spring-Easter to Last Day of School
Summer-First Day of Summer Vacation to Last Day of Summer Vacation
Fall-First Day of School to Thanksgiving.

Okay, so this summer has been completely crazybusyawesomefabulous!!  Between school, work, and trying to hold together a semblance of a personal/social life I am exhausted!  Well this post is about life lessons learned at the Jersey Shore.  The REAL shore, not the one with Snooki.  So here goes:

1) Be confident.  Going to the beach is nerve-racking!!  Every girl has some sort of body issue and going to the beach is sometimes a nightmare because things are never perfect. I usually end up cursing myself for drinking that soda or wishing I had done more cardio but at the end of the day, I didn't so, oh well!  Once I got to the beach I started looking around and noticed that while yes, there were some genetically blessed people there, most people looked...normal?  I'm always happy to see people who look healthy and are happy with themselves.  Nerves Gone!

2) Standing in line for samples on the Boardwalk is no joke!  You wouldn't believe the number of times  an elbow got me or a mom ran over my toes with a stroller.  Not cool.  But what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

3) Clothing on the Boardwalk in AC is open to interpretation.  Just trust me.  Pants are not always pants.  A top is not always a top.  Anything goes really!

4) Serindipity comes in all forms...even in walnut fudge.  If it's not obvious from my blog's title I am a HUGE believer in Serindipity.  I'm definitely one of those girls who believes that everything happens for a reason.  So here's my serindipity moment.  I love chocolate.  Scratch that am obsessed with chocolate.  I love sampling the fudge up and down the boardwalk!  As per tradition, when I leave the beach I always bring home fudge for the fam.  All day the Boardwalk was sampling chocolate walnut fudge and I was getting pretty psyched about it.  I'm a traditional girl and I don't like when things infiltrate my chocolate, but the walnut fudge was melting my steel heart.  As I'm waiting on line I was debating if I wanted to get that fudge or regular chocolate fudge.  My family is also very traditional and we don't like when people mess with our chocolate so I decided to get regular chocolate fudge.  Or so I thought.  I ended up walking towards the cash register instead of watching the candy clerk and he ended up giving me chocolate walnut fudge.  I didn't realize this until I got home and saw that there was an interloper in my fudge!!  Well, guess what?!  The whole trip home I wondered about what would happen if I had ordered the walnut fudge because it was DALISH! Well, I got home, opened the box and saw that there was in fact chocolate walnut fudge!!  Even though this sounds totally stupid and more like an Er, the guy messed up.  This is not a sign from the cosmos.  I still choose to believe that sometimes the universe knows what you really want even more than what you do.  Sometimes what you think you want, you are not meant to have.  Sometimes you are meant to enjoy the chocolate walnut fudge even more than what you're comfortable with.

So my life lessons learned from the shore are:
-be confident
-be assertive in the samples line
-wear what you want to wear
-enjoy whatever life throws at you in your very own personal box of chocolates.  Because you never know what you're going to get.  And sometimes, that is the sweetest surprise of them all.

-E

Reasons Why Country Girls Shake It For Luke Bryan

Benjamin Franklin told us in life there are two certainties:  Death & Taxes.  Well, all do respect to one of my favorite Philadelphians I think we should say that In Life there are THREE certainties:  Death, Taxes, and Girls Will Shake It For Luke Bryan.  I have compiled a list of why country any girl will shake it for Luke Bryan.

1)  He plays piano

come on...no lady can resist a man who plays piano ;)

2)  He plays guitar

again, musicians are adorable!

3)  He writes songs about burgeoning relationships and THAT is hard to do.  I love that part of relationships!  That part where you don't know what it is/will be come!  It's all so exciting and he captures it in a song.  My favs from this genre are:

• Crash My Party
• I Don't Want This Night To End

4) He writes songs about that time in your relationship where things are just not good.  The indifferent stage in the breakup.  Since I know this stage of the break up SUPER well, I connect to these songs.  Here are my favs:

• Do I
• Someone Else Calling You Baby

5) He calls little kids up on stage!  Loved when he did this this past Saturday.  The crowd sang "Country Boy Shake It For Me" to this adorable little boy!  Precious!

6) He is patriotic.  He called up a guy who was leaving for Parris Island in July and everyone started chanting USA, USA, USA!! My friend and I always get emotional during this part of every country concert because it is so important to publicly acknowledge all that our servicemen and women do for us every day.  This may be my favorite aspect of country music:  All of the musicians are so patriotic and grateful for all that they do for us.  

7) He cried when he thanked his fans for buying tickets.  This may be my second favorite part of country music.  The artists always thank you for "spending your hard earned money" on tickets to see them.  His humility was palpable and it was a beautiful thing!

8) He is so appreciative of winning the ACM Entertainer of the Year.  This is a fan voted on award and he deserved it!  I saw him last year with Jason Aldean and he DESERVED IT!  He stole the show, no offense Jason, but he did.

9) He shakes it during Country Girl Shake It For Me!  And honestly...who doesn't love that?!  A guy who can dance and be silly?  A WIN in my book!

10)  He is married!  I'm  a sucker for a good love story and singers who have healthy non-public marriages.  He's also a dad...so cute!

Plus I got to go with my girls!